There is one inalienable truth to posting things on the internet: someone is going to read it. Its not always the person that you want to read it, and with everything else, all actions have consequences. This is why I dont post things I dont want other people to know. I learned that lesson already, but obviously not everyone has. You reap what you sow, plain and simple, and who are any of you to tell me how I should be reacting. I didnt do anything to deserve this, but through the actions of other people Im left (again) having to pick up the pieces. Its ironic to note that he's probably the only person who knows just how fragile I actually am. (Not that I think he gives a damn, he obviously didnt the four years we were together, Im just making a point.)
I think what people dont get is that I blog because this is how I work out issues. Im not moody or insolent or bitchy in person, I get it out on here so that I dont have to take it out on other people. Im way too considerate for my own good. I rely too much on "do unto others" and Im not even Christian. So much so that it seriously bothers me how low people can actually get. I think that's why this whole situation upset me, I just dont get it. It has nothing to do with the fact that he actually cheated, because (again) it just confirmed what I had no proof of previously. I just dont get how people could know what he was doing and even think that he was in any ways a respectable guy. Im too good to put much effort into hating him though, he's not worth it. Im better without him, period.
Im not saying this is over, but between talking it out with whoever will listen, and venting here (which is what blogs are for afterall) Im getting it out of my system rather well. Im actually told by everyone else that I've been taking this better than a lot of people would. I've actually been extremely reserved about what I've said about either of them, especially her (why should I be nice to him now?). I even went so far as to edit a post because I felt bad for being harsh. I never edit or delete posts. But, look where that got me.
In other news, my stats have been the highest in the last two days that they have been in a month.
(Bonus points for anyone who names the song lyrics I've been using as titles.)
{Monday, September 11}
Give me one more medicated peaceful moment Because I dont wanna feel this overwhelming hostility.
