And the saga continues. I know for a fact he cheated on me with her. I dont know the full story, like when exactly it happened, but I really want to. I think I deserve to know all of this. I had suspicions that there were things going on at one point, but he made me feel like I was this psycho jealous girlfriend and it was all in my head. Obviously Im not and it wasnt. I cant really describe how good it feels to finally know that. Its like I've been vindicated. I dont feel the least bit hurt or betrayed, anything I felt toward him or that relationship I've long since gotten over.
Its actually weird, because I want to know, but I dont want to hear it from him. I've severed my ties with him and dont care to talk to him ever again. As far as Im concerned, he can die in a fire. I think Im more likely to get the truth out of her, and at this point, there's no reason for me to hold any ill will toward this girl. If she can live with herself knowing that she had sex with someone else's boyfriend, its on her consious and not mine. I dont say that to be bitchy or anything, life is about choices, and that's the choice she made. And Im sure she's matured in the years since it happened. Plus, chances are, whatever he was telling her about me at the time wasnt true and she would have had no way to actually know what was happening in his and my relationship. Im not saying she's a victim or anything, but look at the kind of guy he is.
Im glad I found out now, as opposed to when it was happening, or even right when I broke up with him. Im glad I found out now because Im over him, and Im over the relationship. Finding out about him cheating allows me to relish the fact that no matter what else happened, I can still say "Hey, but I didnt fuck anyone else". I come out on top in this situation because I am the one who did nothing wrong. I win.
And as a semi-related matter, Janice and I had already made plans to go for coffee tonight when this whole thing came up, and I was beside myself with excitement since yesterday waiting to tell her. My ex and Janice's boyfriend Jason were friends, and Jay still talked to my ex after we were broke up. Im fine with that, I cant control what other people do. Anyway, I guess about a month ago Jay asked my ex to go for coffee while he was in town, my ex agreed, but then couldnt be found when the time came. At this point, none of us should be surprised. Anyway not long after that my ex's mother goes up to Jay (at the bar where he works) and starts going on about how Jay apparently only asked my ex for coffee so that he could pump my ex for information for me. This woman is under the impression that I actually care what my ex does with his life now. Some people seriously need to get over themselves. If I cared so much, I would not have broken up with him. I was as done then as I am done now. What he does is not my business. The cheating thing, though, that happened when he was with me, that is my business.
{Friday, September 8}
Did I mention I hate high drama?
